Thankful For My Best Self

Thanksgiving…… It seems, to me, that most Thanksgivings I find myself feeling stressed about so many things. The cleanliness of my home, getting the food complete at the right time, whether everyone has something they love on the table etc. It is only for a few moments in the day that I find time to truly be Thankful. This year I find myself at our lake house, a dinner that was supposed to be our family of 5 and my parents has become smaller and is me, my husband, daughter and two sons. For this, I am so thankful. 

As our children have aged, precious moments seem few and far between. With a 22 and 21 year old and a 17 year old, they have grown out of the silliness and jovial nature with which they used to move. Every so often I see sparks of it and it brings true happiness to that moment, but they aren’t little kids any longer. So, having them all here together is so special. I sit in the loft listening to the goings on in the house and hear my sons engaging in video games together, our dogs pattering around the house, the silence of my daughter studying for college and my hubby doing dishes and singing (he’s the best). Playing on the radio is Hallelujah by Jeff Buckley, and typically I wouldn’t get teary eyed from it, but today I feel it. 

I am so grateful for the life that has been given to me, so grateful for the humans (and canines) that make my family complete and the friends that keep me right and authentic. I have been blessed with a forever home, and a vacation home. I have been given the chance to follow my dreams, with encouragement. I have been gifted, by the gods, children who I look at with amazement, even in the moments they push me to my limit. My life has had many trips around the world and adventures into places most dream about going. I look forwards to the next year and see trips to Costa Rica, The Bahamas, Amsterdam and France, and Bali and Australia. Damn, this life is blessed. 

I do not write about all of this to be boastful but to say a resounding Thank You to the Universe. I couldn’t be more Thankful or Grateful for the place that I occupy in this world. We are so blessed, and blessings are not all that we have. We have moments of sorrow, disappointment and anger, but it is in the good moments that I am reminded of how small the bad are. In contrast to the bigger picture of greatness that exists within my life the lows are minuscule. One time someone said to me to choose your arguments in life, and weigh the cost of what you are going to fight for. This is often in the back of my mind, not that it always prevails but I try. That’s just it, I try and it is the best I can do. As one of The Four Agreements states: Always Do Your Best. I am a constant work in progress, as we all are and through all of the high and low moments in life, keep reminding yourself to just do your best. Your best in that moment, not your best that you have created in your mind. 

My best self is an ever-changing roller coaster of yes and no moments. That excitement of what is to come coupled with the dread of it at the same time. Its amazing how you can feel so many contradictory emotions at once but that is what being a human being is all about. Ride it out. Ride out the moments of best and worst self, and learn how and why and commit those experiences to memory so you can grow from them. Knowing this is true, has me observing the people I love and seeing their moments. Thankful for the chance to be here and be a part of this. Today I do not feel stressed about Thanksgiving, I feel Thankful and I feel Joy to have these moments to love and wrap my family up in my love. Today I will be my Best Self, my best self for today. I will hear what is said, I will feel what is given, and I will eat sooo much food. My belly, mind and heart will be full. 

I am Thankful for My Family

I am Thankful for My Community

I am Thankful for Music

I am Thankful for Life

I am Thankful for My Best Self